What do you call your students?

 April 11, 2021

What do you call your students? 

I teach 8th grade. Developmentally, these students are trying to find themselves. They don't have a good idea of who they are (I know, even at my age, I'm still searching some of the time). They are getting (in my state) some responsibilities that go along with adulthood (they can drive at age 14); some are taking on babysitting jobs, lawn care, and other tasks that even a couple of years ago they wouldn't have been able to do without adult supervision. 

As my students look ahead to high school, this conversation has happened frequently in my room. They are being told to "act their age" while at the same time being told "you're a kid - what would you know?". They are being expected to have control over emotions and reactions, but if that slips they are told they are "childish." They want to have conversations where they are taken seriously, but they are told they don't know enough about the topic to join in. Adults call them children, but these kids see that as demeaning. They want to be taken seriously, and they want to be heard, but there are times when they don't have the knowledge or the skills to know how to accomplish that. 

I call my 8th graders my adults in training. They aren't children - they are well past that, especially in our current world where they are exposed to things I didn't know until much later in my teens. Some have family issues that have caused them to grow up more quickly than others. Some are trying to earn money to help their family. These concerns aren't new, but I do believe they are more common. Add information availability overload, and they are overwhelmed. They want to be part of a world about which they know very little about the rules and expectations, and sometimes they don't have people to help them navigate. 

As adults, our job is to help them navigate, and we must do it in a respectful way. This doesn't mean we give them full visitor rights. It means we guide; we direct; we correct when necessary. And how do we do that?

We must be respectful to these people. I'm hearing - both in my community and in the larger world - people who don't understand the feelings, the emotions, these kids have. Some adults treat these young people as if they are five but expect them to act as if they are 50. That must stop. These young people are adults in training. We must listen to them and hear what they are saying. We must ask why they believe that and help them develop their own critical thinking. We must understand they see this world from a very different perspective than someone of my age. One of us isn't right and the other wrong - we must see it as it is, which is different. 

The best question I ask my students is "What do you think about that?" followed by "Can you help me understand why you think that?" or "Can you tell me what led you to that thought?" We do that when talking about characters in a book or current events. I hope to help them develop the skills I find lacking in some of the adult role models they have. 

But I digress. It's really about respect for these young teens. It's about building a relationship in which they will accept praise and criticism (given appropriately). I know I want to be respected and seen as a person with something to contribute. My 8th graders are trying to find their way in the adult world they are entering. If we don't offer that, if we don't provide that guidance, we are neglecting an opportunity to help guide, shape and positively influence the future. 

What do you call your students? It really doesn't matter on the age or stage. It's all about something which is respectful.