No Crystal Ball

June 16 finds me not on or planning a vacation. It doesn't find me resting after the fast and furious weeks of the end of school, with all the activities normally attended. 

Instead, it finds me almost marking the days off to July 10, when our state will release its school reopening plan. Our district has a committee that will meet in late July to plan and prepare for our anticipated Aug. 10 return (students two days later). I'm anxious - literally - to know what that entails. I'm excited and apprehensive to know what this means for my students and for me. 

For the first time in my teaching career, I bought a planner. I found during our teach-from-home time that I needed some way to make lists of what I wanted to put out on Google Classroom for my students, what I had already created, and what I needed to do. I went through printer papre quickly. A planner will help me be a bit more organized, I think, in not only teaching virtually but also in a traditional classroom. Either way, it won't go to waste. (My August is already filled out . . . hopeful on a traditional return but able to do what I've planned virtually as well.)

My big concern is the relationship with students. I will have all 8th grade this year. These kids will be new to me. Last year, I started with a 5/1 split of 8th and 7th. It was the third year in a row for me to have those kids in the 8th grade (I primarily taught 6th their 6th grade year; their 7th grade year I had three classes of that level). I knew most of them; I'd established relationships with many of them. 

Learning names is a struggle for me. Part of the reason, I truly believe, is the eye problem I have that diminishes my fine detail vision at distances. I've never been good at this, though, so maybe it's just an excuse. I think one of the most important acts I can do is call my students by name. It's a big part of their identity. I'm Carrie, not Terry. Trust me. I hear the difference, and I try to give grace when someone is trying and just doesn't have it quite right. But the 5th time I've gently corrected and it hasn't changed starts to rankle me. So names is one of the first things I need to get right. I use a seating chart for this, and I ask my students when I call their name to make sure they raise a hand and make eye contact to help me. You'd be surprised at the buy-in I get when I tell them why I need it. 

I also believe in proximity. I think we learn about each other in a space 2 feet apart, not 6 feet apart. Students are way more likely to share when they think the group that potentially will overhear is way fewer people. I'm concerned about my ability to be near them. Let's be honest - who stands near you? Friends? Family? Those people you trust and let into your cirlce, right?? It's the same way for my students. I want to be able to have that trust area. 

My 8th graders get used to circle time. We put our chairs together; we gather. No one gets to "hide" behind a desk; no one's back is to another. Sometimes, I change who they sit by; other times it doesn't matter. It's a time when I read to them and we discuss. I might use it to introduce a concept, skill, or word. It's a tool I use with them - they just don't always realize I'm using it to understand them. I can see nods, furrowed foreheads, eye rolls -  you name it. I also use it just to talk with them - not to them - with them. This is important. Our students get talked "to" a lot. We need to be talking with. I can't imagine not having circle time. 

Each of these concerns isn't about delivering content. I have those, too. But I know I can't deliver content if I'm not someone they trust and respect. Not like, necessarily, although that does go a long way. My biggest concern is how will I adapt making relationships - strong, deep, lasting relationships - with my students in a way that might be around quite a while. I'm processing and planning on that.